West Ham United 4 : 0 Wolverhampton Wanderers

West Ham proved you do get something for two in a bed after Jarrod Bowen’s double sank a lacklustre Wolves side.

They hammered Wolves with four goals to turn their goal difference positive and crawl into the top half of the EPL table due to that goal difference ahead of six other clubs. Thomas Soucek and Sebastien Haller added the third and fourth on a unexpectedly comfortable night for West Ham.

Whether you’re first, seventh or eighteenth, it’s always harder to retain a place than to attain it. Wolves will find last year’s seventh hard to emulate on this showing. Pedro Nieto apart, they looked very ordinary.

Yet they were the better side in the early stages.

The persistence of Nieto seemed to unsettle the Hammers early but the trajectory of the game changed in the 17th minute.

West Ham were awarded an innocuous free kick in an innocuous midfield area, after Willy Boly upended Michail Antonio.

With commendable vision, Pablo Fornals knew Bowen was free on the right without turning round.

He turned on a sixpence and passed accurately to Bowen upfield, while Antonio was still sportingly picking up Boly in the centre circle.

Bowen received, dribbled, cut inside Romain Saiss and with his left foot curled the ball beyond Rui Patricio.

It was an outstanding individual effort from Bowen which ended 17 minutes of West Ham being second best.

Eight minutes later it was nearly 2-0 but Patricio denied Tomas Soucek’s goal-bound effort.

Shortly after the keeper frustrated the same player with a reflex save from a header which he should really not have won so close to the goal line.

Three minutes from the interval, only a superb defensive header by Vinagre denied the Hammers a second.

Patricio still had to palm away a blaster from Antonio.

It was all West Ham but ominously just before Atkinson blew the whistle for half time, West Ham keeper Lukasz Fabianski made his first real save from Ruben Neves.

But it was not a portent of things to come merely a blip.

Shortly after the interval, Ryan Fredericks was forced off with an injury, Ben Johnson replacing him. Nieto continued to be a threat and dribbled into the heart of the West Ham box until stopped on the point of shooting.

Angelo Ogbonna won a key header and though Wolves prodded, West Ham looked safe.

They looked far safer shortly after when Bowen doubled the lead.

Antonio found Pablo Fornals whose excellent effort hit the post. Bowen reacted first to tap in the rebound.

Fabio Silva replaced Traore as Nuno Santo looked to shake up the slumber. It failed.

Shortly after Bowen’s quest for a hat trick was denied by Saiss’ boot, Soucek crept in at the near post unchallenged to head in an Aaron Cresswell corner against some frankly awful and dozy defending. If anyone bar Bowen deserved a goal, it was the Bohemian midfielder.

Nelson Semedo and Joao Moutinho were replaced by Vitinha and Ki-Jana Hoever but by then the die was cast.

Bowen and Antonio left to give Mark Noble and Sebastien Haller some minutes, and both deserved what passes for an ovation in empty stadium.

The icing on the cake was a fourth. A perfect cross by Masuaka was headed down and in by substitute Haller.

West Ham take their first points of the season and Wolves didn”t even get their bus fare home.

Then again, West Ham didn’t win a speedboat.